The Colbert Report/Episodes/EpGuide/Episode 458
Production Info The Check-In * Dr. Colbert greets His Jewish Friend with Saturday NIght Live catch phrases. Intro The Presidential Campaign * the market may be down, but the mob is up! * the media is in the tank for Barack Obama * the media mentioned Obama's relationship with Bill Ayers ** They're gay married! * Americans went around the media filter in the town hall debate * Dr. Colbert decides to hold a town hall meeting * Dr. Colbert got into town hall mode ** tajke off jacket ** roll up sleeves ** loosen tie ** undo pants *** Voila! Average Joe Sixpack * woman: lost her job, cannot pay mortgage ** when will campaign directly *** Obama pals around with terrorists * a young man asked ** is it fair to talk about a Reverend? *** no, off limits * a hipster ** doesn't remember the reason why he bought a McCain t-shirt * a domestic terrorist ** how best to associate himself with Barack Obama *** Jimmy assisted with an on-screen graphic that said "barack is the bomb" Threat Down! 4 Obama channel! * Dish Network #400 (?) plays campaign over and over ** Dr. Colbert could not turn away; it burned into his brain 3 Bulls! * a company is now selling bullet proof matador suits * bulls are now packing heat ** will destroy bull fighting 2 Bears! * a black bear walked into a Subway sandwich shop ** they will be leaner, and meaner and aster than ever 1 Zombies! * The USA Today ** Humans v Zombies nerf game on America's campuses The Bailout: A Commie Trojan Horse * back from the break Dr. Colbert was fully dressed * we gave control of America's companies to the government * Dr. Colbert couldn't stop drinking vodka * religion may be the opium of the masses, but vodka is the vodka of the masses * comics are a simple, clear and effective way to convey the new red menace * libraries goal is not to turn a profit * our patriotic libraries * check out all the books we can * and never return them * Thus finishing the job Ronald Reagan started! * Dr. Colbert not only doesn't return the books, he defaces them ** he recommends "Sexodus" by Leon Urine Interview * Nate Silver * a baseball statistician who claims he can predict the outcome of the election; Dr. Colbert is hoping for a rain out * makes a living playing with numbers, as males play baseball * predicts the Rays * has a webtube called FiveThirtyEight.com * considers his web tube a chorizo in sausage terms * predicts there is an 89% chance Obama will win * claims he is unbiased * if Obama is like the Tampa Bay Rays * McCain is like Seattle Pilots or Minnesota Braves * predicted when we'll have jetpacks Epilogue * Dr. Colbert wishes a personalized "good night" to Christina and Kelly DeFazio of Locust, New Jersey! Gallery Image: Image: Image: Image: Image: Image: Image: Image: Motherload Videos External Tubes *Link Title *Link Title Reviews and Comments